The Weekend of FIRST"S and Adventure of the Queer Bear In New York City. This was written in 2008 and never published..

The day started with me waking up  around 8 am... Hmmm What do I have to do- Clean up dog poop on patio, double check all the stuff I got ready for mom, throw some gear and cloths in a bag, shave, trim my beard and hair then shower.....Oppps I better buy my bus ticket lol... Wow Great it is $36.00 round trip on Gray Hound....  Then off I go, cab to commuter rail, then train to South Station in Boston, Bus to New York, then AHHHHHHHHHHH.... I can relax a bit..Oh what  the Gray hound bus broke down and we have to go on the Peter Pan Bus.   WHich left a half an hour late,Hello Mr Arabian Night Bus driver I have people to meet in the City..... The beginning of the not so great things to come lol... The entire buss is inferior to the new Gray hound Buses.  Seats are closer together, harder, shocks suck and did I mention the seats are close together. ( You get to know the people in front of you real well, to bad it is a gal not a cute sexy boy like to my Diagonal left, a twenty something 6'2 Blondie, beefy hunky kid with a hell of a package.....Yes I am a bad bear...  At least I can look at him  while  he scratches his balls and reads a real  book ( a big o'l fat, thick one the book that is, not an I pad or kindle a real book, how retro and radical... LOL) Damm it is a quiet bus well it has been for over two hours till the baby decided to cry n cry n cry n cry....   (Reason 456 why I am a FAG)  Still crying... But I digress......   Oh here is a question to you guys- when did BIG head phones come back in style? There is like 10 people here with them on, like the kind from the seventies only modern looking.      
The Queer Bear would like to know....... Happy days are here again the baby stopped after 18 minutes.... Praise Jesus....

Well can you believe it, at the age of 36 ..... OK 39......  OK 40....... Fine fine Freak-en 42 I actually have some firsts still , you know doing something for the first time, can you believe it.  ( Like a virgin touched for the first time  ohh ohh ohh  - Holly Madonna)   The Black Party will be my first Black Party and a party of this size also. The same for the Black Party After Party and Allegria.  Before all this goes down what ever  happens with it is Joe La Mattina's and Sal Occhipinti's fault... I am full of anticipation.... It's keeping me waiting..... ( Now I want some steak fries)  Any hoo this should prove to be an adventure to remember. ( Well if am am with Sal I might not remember all of it for some reason I am sure....

   OOOOOO  I see a striped car on side of high way we must be getting close to the city......

The PIG of HAPPINESS

Hello  to all my Sweeties... I have discovered a  amusing author by the name of Edward Monkton.  I was in Barnes and Nobel in the Prudential Mall last summer when I was cruising these two HOT ready to eat guys and out of the corner of my eye I saw a sweet little  PRETTY PINK PIG.  Those of you who know me know that I just love a nice PIG, (get your mind out of the gutter it was on a book and I used to have a pet pig Penelope the Pot Belly Pig) I saw a cartoon of Pretty Pink Pig on this extremely small white book entitled -


The PIG of HAPPINESS................ 


(no it is not a Chinese dish).  It is about this PRETTY PINK PIG who was a bit different, ( she was a bit flamboyant, good at decorating, loved Cher, put together a party for 100 in a flash, you know the type.. )  I think he might be QUEER ... Just a thought.  He was just not like the other PIG's, besides the fact he was a PRETTY PINK PIG.  He felt something deep inside (like a good  pig should) You know that certain feeling that loud mouth the QUEER BEAR is always ranting about, LOVE & HAPPINESS..... HMMMMM......  Oh wait thats me... Silly QUEER BEAR....  Anyway all of those other ordinary, boring, narrow minded,  pigs bitched, moaned  and complained about everything.  I do mean everything.......  They had nothing good to say to anyone or about anyone.  They did not even have any good thoughts in there piggy heads. (I think we know some people like that.....Ohhhh I am biting my tongue.)   Happy Thoughts think Happy thoughts.......... OK I am back on track......


Oh Before I forget, I will put link at end of this so you can check out author and I will put the you tube video on here so you can see what the author really wanted to get across. Here is where I give it MY OWN SPECIAL FLAVOR.  Take note this is a lot like life and the people in it.  At least in my whirly life.  Off we go..... 


  Here we are on the farm, it is dismal, gloomy. ( that can be kind of relaxing sometimes, great sex weather...)  The Pigs start to come out of there  Piggy Pig pens.  ( We will call this group The Mean Girls from Sorority Row). They would say: "oh shit the weather sucks again.  It is cold. Ugh it's dark and wet, look I am getting all frizzy.  Why did we bother to come out in this crap."  ( they always make sure everyone on the farm hears them )  They yell at a few of the other piggy pigs. Push a few down. One Mean Pig says: "Oh Look I just did my nails there's to much mud here. OMG. Are you listening to me!!!!"   The head mean pig says come on girls lets go back and get some Pellegrino.  Then they mope back shaking there mean piggy ass to there mean piggy pen.  SLAM goes there door with a huff and a flip of there mean piggy head.  All the other pigs are mumbling , grumbling and stomping around. They are saying things like, this farm SUCKS,  the slop is not smelly enough, Derick has a small prick and what the fuck are you looking at Mary Louise you have a fat ass and I don't mean Phat.  One Pig says " this weather SUCKS it's to hot.. to wet..  wa - wa - wa - wa - moan - bitch - moan - bitch". 


   I say enough already, it is just horrible, I feel dirty ( not in a good way either) KARMA is no where to be found.  KARMA .... KARMA..... Come out ...Oh Kamilah girl Hi there...  (OK NOT TO FUNNY). But  there was negative and venomous  energy in abundance. We all know how I just love that. ( I know I can attract that shit like a magnet) . But Please.......... Ok RJ get back to the story. 


    All of a sudden the PRETTY PINK PIG pops out of his  Laura Ashley straw bed, looking fresh, vibrant and like  he was up for hours...The PRETTY PINK PIG  stood tall and proud with his PRETTY PINK head held up high.  Oh wait  before I forget just the other day the PRETTY PINK PIG decided to be an EXTRAORDINARY  PRETTY PINK PIG and see the Good in Every One, the Fabulousness in any Situation, to Spread Cheer- Love -Happiness and Joy wherever she ,the EXTRAORDINARY PRETTY PINK PIG went.  She said I will be known from this day forward as The PRETTY PINK PIG of HAPPINESS.  I will stomp out sadness, cruelty, bitterness, taunting,  and anything that will bring a Perky Pig down.  I will lift up all these pigs that have been trampled on by my fellow Pigs.  I feel it growing inside of me, stirring, heaving, Oh My Pig  (Oh the joy, Oh Baby , OHHHHHH YESSS OHH YESSS YESS Oh GOD YESS  " Ill have waht piggy is having" )  No he is not having an orgasmic piggy moment.....  The Happiness is growing in side of him. It can not be held back.  God it is spreading like wild pig...  The HAPPINESS can not be held back, it is leaking  from him on to the other pigs like Happy Swine Flu....   Look the Pigs are Smiling, Laughing, Dancing, Talking, Saying Wonderful things to each other....It is Piggy Pig Paradise. 


Guess what all that HAPPINESS the PRETTY PINK PIGS  have is starting to leak to the others on the farm... The Chicks are Carefree and Happy...  The Sheep are BAAAAA BAAAA Beautifully Joyous.....   Just wait till it spreads to the Cows..... No more mad cow, HAPPY COWS across the land......


All this means is lets be HAPPY and spread HAPPINESS AND LOVE all over, to EVERYONE.  Just a smile and a sweet knowing look can do it.  


Lets all become EXTRAORDINARY PRETTY PINK PIGS OF HAPPINESS.. I am a PIG OF HAPPINESS... 



Well that is enough ranting for now, I want to send you all Big Strong BearHugs Licks Loven & Happiness 
from  R J The QUEER BEAR 


Before I forget PLEASE  Post a Comment, vote on a REACTION and Please share with others. 
THANK YOU


Below is the link of PIGGY HAPPINESS 




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoiIYlww8M4&feature=player_embedded

PISCES Party at The Ritz Bar ( The Fish Dance Again)

First off I have to say what a great space at The Ritz  Gay Bar, Lounge and Night Club at 369 West 46th St NYC. There are three Amazing Levels each with there own Surprises, Hidden Agendas and Unique Atmosphere. But the third level is the most Intimate of all with a great presence of City Charm and Character yet offering Intimate Comfort.   I give it Queer Bear Thumbs Up.  My Queer Bear Hat off to Mr Tommy Greco The Owner ~he is the bomb, (for a big ole' WOP of a Guinea).  I say that with the utmost love and respect. After all I am also a WOP.... I really love him even if he is str8. Oh by the by Tommy it is 2011 time to get a WEB SITE Paisan. (again with love)......Look I am smiling......

 So this is how the story goes.  Fernando had to be there way too early  like, 6 PM or so.  He had to set up ( plug wires in) oh and get a platform so he could see over the DJ booth!  Time rolled on and on and on.  Just think we gave up our one meal of the weekend to do all this stuff... What???   Any Hoo...Sal : "I got a Fuji Polaroid camera, won't it be cool if I take pictures of all the people as they come in", ( he wanted to hand it to them and have them carry it around all night in case they forgot who they were).  As usual, I had to give my two cents ( damm pushy bottom) I think it would be a great idea if we make a big production of it and tape them to the wall in the most visited room, ( The Bathroom With a Shower in it....hmmmmmm).  First of a few bad ideas... (in away).  So time rolled on and on....Then it was 8:00PM,   hmmmmm then the inevitable happened. ( damm moon shoes ~ okay wink wink  Moonstruck....) Then it was 9 ish and the flow of friends started pouring in.....
 Last word from Joe, "it will be a low key evening, we will just chill." ( RJ : "Chill my  hairy ass"...)

  Sal Occhipinti : "RJ can you take the Polaroid Pictures so I can use my six thousand dollar camera in automatic it is fucking stuck in it.  -Dammm Fuck Shit I should have read the directions.". "Sure", I said.  "It will be a blast! ....OFFFFF I go...  Well, it was a great ice breaker for the sixty people I did not know... "Hi, I am RJ can I take your picture (with this HUGE white camera), Why you say?  Oh Sal O. thought it was a cool idea.  Ok now.. SMILE.. you can pick up your picture when you depart this Bumpy Ride in The Bath Room, With a  Shower in it."  (  and no not one dam tip, fucking cheap New Yorkers, teasing.. ha ha. Love I love.. love....)  So I had to take 100 pictures (or so)...   Excuse me let me in The Bath Room With a Shower in it first please?  OK how do I open this camera to put the cartridges in (fuck they only hold ten pictures)... Fuck, I cant get this dam package opened (it could survive a nuclear blast....What ha what.... ok I need to cut tape for these works of art...  I can't see the dam button.  Where is it?  Do you see it?  Fuck I am blind!!!  Can you see it?   No  we can't.  I asked a younger family member, (she (he) said from 3 feet away) it is on the lower left - it is oval shaped with braille lines on it, what are you blind Daddy?  I said "oh just a bit dear,  oh thanks HUN" , I put my hand up and gave the Sicilian Curse  and mumbled a few choice words, ( may you need glasses, viagra, dentures and maxi pads at age 28 sweet prince) ... I laughed evilly and rubbed my hands.... I turned my head and said  "who the fuck is that?  Lets get her and drink her blood at midnight"....  I digress.....  RJ: " Excuse me let me in The Bath Room With a Shower in it first please?"  You can join me. NO not you honey the cute boy behind you.  So as time rolled on, I was officially the winner of most visits to The Bath Room With a Shower in it.  Hell some folks  even stayed and did there business as I hung the photos( dam all my friends have a head cold) "Um what ha oh pass the tape".. .. "Can you hold this?"... "No, the pictures not my prick"..... "Oh, can I take a picture of your"...... "Oh sweetie you better get that checked David. That ain't right..."  "Why are the twenty people in this Bath Room With A Shower In It ?"..... "Get out of the shower".... "What are you doing with that bottle".....
OK  I need adrink some gin and tonic any one want one?  (bad idea) from My Roman God of a Bartender... Sexy Gay Boy  ( I wish).  No he is a str8 but we can dream... For some  it makes it more of a challenge.  That was a good idea - not-  it will help me look in the tiny hole to see people in the dark amongst all the gyrations going on, fucking fabulous.  (get your mind out of the gutter)....

The Bathroom With a Shower in it? No listen sweetie, it was rhetorical, you have to or you will be flogged in a very unpleasant way by my personal Roman God of a Bartender....  I mean boyfriend....  I mean guard...  (Now fucking smile and go dance, smile God damn it you WHORE.) That was what I was thinking... What I really said oh you are so sexy, thanks sweetie, Kisses Its a keeper...  RJ: "Excuse me let me in The Bath Room With a Shower in it first please? "   . "Oh bartender baby"....

The Mood is Happy & Elevated...  Up Up and away we sore...  Is that a bird... A plane...  No it is Sal Occhipinti.... (see pigs do fly).   Here come the flags....  Yup its kicking in (all those drinks).  Get those damn bees out of my hair..... I tried, but still cannot fly two flags so I just do the one with my grand impression of interpretive  queer bear dance.   ( I just like the colors-- ooh pretty or was that something else)  I also really need some lessons when I have not been up and about all weekend.  Maybe not when the sun is not coming up,  with the scattered past out flaggers or as we call them rookies.  Hmmmm I am sure you all agree....  I digress....  We were graced with some very talented FLAGGERS.  We are so lucky to have them in our Tribe.  I am always in awe and amazed by the members of the Tribe that still practice this Wonderful Art and the ones that are passing it on the youngsters,  I give you  Queer Bear Props for doing this.  The Tribe and myself thank you.  Oh, if any of our flag makers want to make or donate an even an old pair,  Old like me. ( This is when you say you are not old baby...)  This will make a grumpy Bear very happy, more then you will ever know.... I like bright colors, Big is Good~ they look so grand!  LOL .... Just a subliminal message hmmmm...  Flags for RJ Flags for RJ.

"Dam, now where did Joe L go?.... Fernando: "RJ, go check on him".. Sal  O : "Well RJ, did you?...  Oh come here and take some pictures"...  Eddie : "Well, is he ok"...  Fernando: "Hello, my drink.. Dim the lights"...  Sal: "RJ I got something to make it all better."

RJ : "Oh Here is Joe, he is better, well a bit green but he  can ambulate and form words.  That is a bonus"...  As I pause and think for a moment...  ( Four hours on greyhound with a twenty year old peppy girl that ate M&M's the entire way, and told me the story that is HER..  WORTH IT FOR SURE.  Actually it was.  Even though I was screaming inside," just shut up please shut up.. choke on that fucking M&M's"...   But she lived...) - NO TWENTY YR OLD PEPPY GIRLS WERE HARMED IN THIS MESSAGE-   Joe: "RJ I told you should have stolen that coat rack for my friends coats,  now look at this fucking mess.  Listen to me next time" ( Gee Joe started to get sick again after that hmmmmm....  RJ: "My Roman God of a  Bartender, can I have a double shot of Patron?".. ( GREAT IDEA)

The Tribe Mixed, Mingled, Posed, Danced, Gossiped ( Did you hear what Susan did, My Stars), Groped, Shared Bodily Fluids & Other Stuff, Patted, Poked, Prodded, Drank, Sang, Hooked Up, Bumped Up, ( with the i Phone app ~Bump), Planned for future Gatherings, Powdered there noses a lot,  Listen to the Beat, Thump - Thump - XANADU -- XANADU -  Swoosh- Ring - Ting - Thump - Thump.... Feel the Heat.. Smell the Scents, Enjoy the View... Feel the Love... We are all Moving, Swaying, Pulsating,  as One.... OK OK back to the pictures.  Well I still have to take 20 more fucking pictures.  OK Now the crotch shots start ( oh and Barbra Goods Bazoooms..  OOOOOOOO  They are BIG  & LUSCIOUS).  RJ: "Did some one turn up the heat, Dam is it menopause?  I have my estrogen patch on...   OOO I can't feel my arm... It is Numb.... Oh wait it is Sal's leg , Woo thank God. (but why is Sal's leg on my shoulder?  Hmmmm...)"  Boom Boom I want to take you to my Room (The Bath Room With a Shower in it)  Oh yeah Baby .... OH Not one of you old Sainted Queens brought any floor wax. { I was shocked so much so I had to find something to make me forget }.   Must be that senility setting in, or all those years of Healthy, Clean, Responsible Living, Hmmmmm.....That's the ticket.   Next time just ask Dennis McCrum, he gets it by the case. He Knows how to throw a dance party.  He  also knows how to make it all slippery ( I mean the dance floor, you pig!)  RJ: "OK Six more fucking pictures, I mean six more  pieces of art capturing the love and essence of our family"....  RJ: "Oh Sal I need you to lift me up." ( on this stool to take a picture) umm ahh ummm.... The beat goes on n on n on n on......  At the DJ stand I mean booth, look at how happy Fernando is.... Fernando: "RJ Is he".. RJ says "stop!!!!! He is all set.  He's on couch.  He is all better.   Just spin you furry little man, don't make me step on you"....  Two more pictures...  Oh look there are two huge crotch shots (  perfect....Oops,  were they lesbians.. oh well).  RJ: "Excuse me let me in The Bath Room With a Shower in it first please?   RJ: "Excuse me let me in The Bath Room With a Shower in it first please?   RJ :  " FIN."  Where can I shove this camera? .. OK,  Lay it all on me, Let's party like it is 2012 ( mmm is that bad)...  OMG I can dance,,, Speed it up Mr DJ!"

Meanwhile back in the Bar area with our Roman God of ,  Bartender the mood is Gay, boy do I mean Gay .. Look six earthy lesbians came in with thick, huge, curly, ratty, dirty hair, (who they be??) Look over there at all those Nellies, they don't have a stiff wrist  amongst them.  Oh look out the floor is really wet in that corner where they were talking, but the glitter will give some traction...  .( I am an evil Queer Bear).   I  made a B line for the bar to see My Roman God of a Bartender, then to my surprise I feel two huge firm, strong hands on my shoulder,  I quivered  a bit ( it has been since Labor Day) There was a pressing feeling on my rump, so I turned.  It was  Mr Tommy ( this will be great jerk off material someday) with this guy, David Reeves (who's her?) For a brief moment I thought it was one of Tommy's str8 buds. ( Damm, I must have been drunk) Tommy : "RJ what you drinking , put that water down. Let's do Patron Shots! and baby don't you ever change" ( RJ : I love this man).   Tommy, Sal O,  Eddie G. and I  discussed our Italian Lineage in great detail,

 ( too great for the way I was feeling).  We bonded. We hugged. We laughed. .... I kissed Tommy (no that is the fantasy) Tommy is a great guy really.  Let me count the ways ( oops, save that for the fantasy.)

  5 - 4 - 3- 2 -1- We are back live at the bar, During this encounter I learned all about Mr David Reeves,.... All of it (readers digest condensed /cliff-note version).

Oh quick side note~ David got to Ritz after midnight. He called Sal and said, "I can't find the entrance.  I walked all over first floor and second floor for 30 minutes.  All I see is Twinkies, Thugs,  Girls, and a few Queens who I do not know.  I give up".. SAL:" It is on the third floor ( like it says on face book invite you putz)."   DAVID: "Oh Really?  OK.. Be there in a sec".....

And we are back. 5-4-3-2-1 LIVE..... Here we are at the Ritz Bar and Lounge owned by The Handsome, Successful, Strong, Sexy Italian, Tommy  Greco  (Whatttt??? Oh Please. I am a Gay man not  a politically correct green Jewish lesbian that married a native American lesbian that got sperm from a gay black republican.)

 The mood in the party wreaked of LIFE.. These are the times in LIFE when it feels it is all worth it.  As you scan the room, despite the Drama, Bitchiness, Cattiness, Pettiness,  and the so-called faults you point out in people and your own shit that gets in your own way.  What ever drama that you can steer up ( for what ever reason).  This very Party, all of our Gatherings erases all of that CRAP and gives us a REBOOT ON LIFE. Some may call me Crazy, Out of Touch, Touched, Naive or Ignorant  ( well FUCK YOU ) No I love you babe, Really.. I am just Hopeful and Full of Love.   I agree way to trusting but I believe there is good all around.   I know we can make life so much Easier, Happy, Safe, Loving, Fun and Fucking Fabulous.  We have to Slow Down and Listen, Be Real, True, and Honestly Carer About Each Other.  We call ourselves The Tribe, and in that Tribe there are Clans.  But bottom line, we are all Family.  We choose to be Family. We are NOT blood-related.  We are more.   I believe this is more Sacred and Valuable! Let's work on this and make it last.  We have a recipe for Paradise ( Just think about it) We need each other. Who the fuck wants to be alone and unloved Hmmmm?... Morbid as it sounds, we are all Dying. The planet is Dying.  So lets Live Life out Loud......OK that was more then enough serious shit... Let's Dance Like No One Is Watching...

The crowd is thinning.. Bodies are sitting together, holding each other. People are smiling and laughing. The "Die-Hard" Troupers are still Dancing it up.. Off in the distance there is a lone Flagger, spinning in a soft, soothing, fluid-like motion.  It is almost Healing and Magical. This is actually one of my favorite parts of the Party~ when you can cuddle up in a small intimate group of four on a couch and share life stories and just BE. (No, nothing sexual.  I may be a pig, but sex is way down on the list compared to this)  But this time I did not stay till bitter end ( so unlike me). This is how it went. RJ: "So Sal O, what are we doing latter? ( we were hanging  off and on all day and I have a boy crush on Him ).  DAVID REEVES:" Um you guys are not doing anything.  I am bear-napping you". RJ: looks at Sal and says, "umm, awkward"..... SAL: "No, No, I love it when my friends hook up. It keeps it in the Family).  DAVID: "Fernando and Joe, I am taking RJ with me".  SAL: Kisses RJ and says, "Trust me, go have fun, I will talk to you later.  After all, you bought your very first Black Party and the Amnesia After-Party Tickets and I have Alegria tickets.  I made the reservation at  the New Secret Gay Betty Ford  Center in Palm Beach for the week after, so we are all set". (That will be a whole other sitcom of as The Bear Spins with the Tribe..  Stay tuned.. Oh Please join my blog as a follower and show me some of that Love I keep talking about ).

Update: Dear old Joe is doing just fine (This too shall pass) NEXT.....

Oh Guys lets all spread the word of This Fantastic, Diversified Gay Establishment.  I give it  5 Paws *****

Like I was saying before, I flew out of there on a Cloud with David Reeves..  but not before drama with the man that yelled at the world, he had real bad hair, got in David's face!  I was so ready to pounce on him Like a Mama Bear protecting her Clan... Don't fuck with my Family.   SO, as far as the closing of this gathering, it will remain a Thought, a Mystery  or just a Wonderful Feeling. As for the rest of my night, that story will be saved for another time.. X Rating For sure  (Between you and me I do not think so, he is so tiny, a pocket cub).....

Well, that's enough ranting for now.  I send you all my Love, Big Bear Hugs & Licks.

RJ, The Queer Bear

My Friend

I woke up today as usual and called your name just then I remembered you are gone, 

I breathed deeply  with a gasp, my heart grew heavy, there was still a scent of you in the air,

The love and joy we shared was like no other, it was unconditional, real, true and absolute,

Unlike most relationships in this event we call life. Most can be so cruel, fake and downright mean,

That is why at the end of the day there was always you no matter what, when I looked in your eyes,

I saw love, hope and a reason to live happily, if only mankind was that way.  

Despite what religion says I know I will see you in the hereafter, whatever and wherever that is.
I hope you are happy, safe and warm. You were loved You are loved. Thank you for your love.
I woke up today and called your name.

R J Gugliotti II

The BEAR rising from the ashes of this thing called LIFE

This is just a quick shout out to any one who is maybe still following this sad and pathetic thing of mine. Here is the Readers Digest Version of whats gone on. Well life just got int he way and it just would not fucking move. Don't you just hate that. After being dismissed with no dam good reason from the Ramrod Machine Crap Club I just got so down. Especially since my so called friends in the industry all of a sudden just disappeared (since I could not get people free crap, tickets, all that shit) it just killed me. I was deeply hurt, dam I knew some of these people for years. I learned who my real friends are, well sort of ( that will be another story latter) . I have not been to any clubs in Boston since April, at first I missed it but I got over that real quick. My new job became a huge endeavor for me, I was doing Home Improvement  and odd jobs with a close friend and some landscaping with his girl. It was great. Fun and great money had by all.  I learned a lot and met some nice and quirky people. The Bear was so happy and content, but I had to leave my friends house because there was to much tension from past problems ( conflicting values, different ideas of friendship and love) Oh did I mention a friend of mine that I worked with for five years robbed  my friends building putting me in a pile of shit ( making people believe I was in on it and I planed it, I even lost a lot (as I moved out that is when I found out how much I did). So this just put me over the edge. I officially do not trust any one at all AT ALL... Until they earn it and even then I am a jaded fagot.... I hope this will pass...... Oh did I mention I was robbed on Washington st in the South End of Boston ( they got my North face back pack, laptop, & Phone, wallet, $3000,00 -Just got paid in cash from a job- and numerous other things... right in front of 7 eleven)  SO much fun... I mean how many times can you kick a dog.   Well that is enough ranting for now. I am using this as therapy for a bit and hopefully this will start to be a positive blog again. As of now I am back in Brockton at my house taking care of Mom full time and dealing with a lot of her medical things that she has ignored. It is going well for the most part. It looks like she may be getting a total hip replacement very soon. She is in so much pain, agony and unstable when she walks. It is all about the quality of life ( which is crappy now- tons of pain pills and no movement and crying... It kills me. So that is my life for a bit. I am determined to get her to a better place in life so the remainder of her life will be more at peace and happy.  Oh I am even opening  myself to talking to family again.. Can you believe that.... SO if any of my friends are out there and want to be in my life here is your chance. Lets erase the board and start new. Life is short and we  will die soon. Lets grab on and enjoy this little time we have here on earth.

Well  there that's enough ranting for now. I want to send Big Bear Hugs & Licks to all with much Beary Love from R J The Bear