The BEAR rising from the ashes of this thing called LIFE

This is just a quick shout out to any one who is maybe still following this sad and pathetic thing of mine. Here is the Readers Digest Version of whats gone on. Well life just got int he way and it just would not fucking move. Don't you just hate that. After being dismissed with no dam good reason from the Ramrod Machine Crap Club I just got so down. Especially since my so called friends in the industry all of a sudden just disappeared (since I could not get people free crap, tickets, all that shit) it just killed me. I was deeply hurt, dam I knew some of these people for years. I learned who my real friends are, well sort of ( that will be another story latter) . I have not been to any clubs in Boston since April, at first I missed it but I got over that real quick. My new job became a huge endeavor for me, I was doing Home Improvement  and odd jobs with a close friend and some landscaping with his girl. It was great. Fun and great money had by all.  I learned a lot and met some nice and quirky people. The Bear was so happy and content, but I had to leave my friends house because there was to much tension from past problems ( conflicting values, different ideas of friendship and love) Oh did I mention a friend of mine that I worked with for five years robbed  my friends building putting me in a pile of shit ( making people believe I was in on it and I planed it, I even lost a lot (as I moved out that is when I found out how much I did). So this just put me over the edge. I officially do not trust any one at all AT ALL... Until they earn it and even then I am a jaded fagot.... I hope this will pass...... Oh did I mention I was robbed on Washington st in the South End of Boston ( they got my North face back pack, laptop, & Phone, wallet, $3000,00 -Just got paid in cash from a job- and numerous other things... right in front of 7 eleven)  SO much fun... I mean how many times can you kick a dog.   Well that is enough ranting for now. I am using this as therapy for a bit and hopefully this will start to be a positive blog again. As of now I am back in Brockton at my house taking care of Mom full time and dealing with a lot of her medical things that she has ignored. It is going well for the most part. It looks like she may be getting a total hip replacement very soon. She is in so much pain, agony and unstable when she walks. It is all about the quality of life ( which is crappy now- tons of pain pills and no movement and crying... It kills me. So that is my life for a bit. I am determined to get her to a better place in life so the remainder of her life will be more at peace and happy.  Oh I am even opening  myself to talking to family again.. Can you believe that.... SO if any of my friends are out there and want to be in my life here is your chance. Lets erase the board and start new. Life is short and we  will die soon. Lets grab on and enjoy this little time we have here on earth.

Well  there that's enough ranting for now. I want to send Big Bear Hugs & Licks to all with much Beary Love from R J The Bear